Pt 1:Identity and Empowerment: Microaggression & Pt 2: Taking Chances

After the STARS event I was able to think about how my identity has affected my life, especially in recent years. I came to realize that I was fortunate enough to be from a high school with great people that accepted me and once they got to know me, did not label me based on my identity. I almost never felt suppressed or different against my 95% white classmates. I can recall feeling uncomfortable in certain situations because of my race only because I was so "white" it was hard to believe that I was actually Mexican. In those instances I definitely felt microaggression. Sometimes I felt offended, like why are you telling me that I do not represent my heritage and my family? Other times I did not really care about it because I could see where people got that impression and I simply was not offended by it.
Other times the microaggression actually came within my own race. I will admit that I realize I have left my Mexican culture a bit and am more Americanized as time passes. It is a bit insulting for people to tell me Im stuck up or that I try and be white because I do not like spicy food and do not like certain Mexican music. What I think those people fail to notice is that I am American. I am a Mexican American living in America. The culture of the American people is my culture too. Mexican culture is also my culture but I am most probably going to stick to the culture which most applies to me which at this point is the American culture.
Microaggression has been present at those instances in my life because I do not think it has really affected me in a negative way.

I think that the instances of Microggression that I can remember were actually hurtful happened last year and know that I look back at them, I realize that they served to make me stronger and build my determination. Those hurtful instances occurred at my job as a waitress last year. As I talked customers in a friendly manner, they may times ask personal questions and many times the talk of college came up and when I would say that I would be attending Loyola University Chicago in the fall I can remember customers responding "YOU?" and I realized that it was surprising to them that I was going to college because I'm Mexican. It was not because I was a girl or because I was working a low salary job at a restaurant: it was because I am Mexican. Those people made me angry at first but then they actually fueled my determination to go to college and to prove to the world that I could do anything I wanted.
Microaggression can be painful but if you can realize that many times those people have no idea what they're talking about, it will only serve to make you stronger.

 

 

TAKING CHANCES AND LIVING A FULL LIFE

Trusting your intuition and trusting that it will lead you to happiness and success is a hard thing to do. I often think about my life and things that a little voice in my head tells me. I am scared to listen to that voice because I feel it doesn't always tell me what I want to hear. This is most apparent in my major. Sometimes I think "what if" I majored in something else. It is scary for me to think about deciding to change my major and it is scary for me to think about realizing my junior or senior year that I hate what I'm doing and regretting the choices I made. My intuition tells me one thing one day and something different the next. I think I am going to minor in something different or at least take a couple classes because I will definitley regret not taking the chance to explore other careers later in my life.

 I find that it is hard for me to believe in my abilities becuase of the fear for failure that I have. I am scared that I would have come to college and then decided to major in something simply because of the security that it provides as opposed to me liking it. I am scared that if I major in something that is not really secure or that makes money, I will also be labeled as a failure. I am not sure what I want to do with my life but I have alot of thinking to do about it and alot of battles to fight against my own fear and my disbeleif in my abilites.

 The blog states that "life is now" and it is an intimidating thing to think about. I think about the fact that I am currently the youngest I will ever be and that I need to be making meaningful memories at this time. It is intimidating because I feel that I am stuck doing my homework and studying for endless tests while I would rather be exploring and living life. The blog later says that we should not focus on the things that we are missing out on because we will alwyas miss out on something but that we should instead make sure to live where we are at the moment becuase we have everything we need to live a full life in ourselves regardless of where we are. I think that this is very true and I feel those moments most when I am having fun with my friends and spending time with my boyfriend. At those moments I realize that I am truly living life to the fullest and I do not need to be on the beach or exploring europe to be having the time of my life.

 Being weird in your own way. – We are all weird. Life is weird. And when we find weirdness in the world that makes us want to work hard, we call it passion. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we call it love. And if we zoom the lens way out, so we can see all the weird people of the world doing their thing, we realize being weird isn’t that weird after all. It’s human nature.

 

 

This is one of the most impacting parts of the entire page for me becuase I think it is extremely beautiful. Everyone is weird in their own way and that is what makes everyone extremely beautiful and unique and when you find something weird that makes you want to work hard that is your passion. I think that I have not founf that weird thing but this is a very accurate definition of a person's passion and when I find the thing that makes me want to work hard I know that I have found my passion. Second, when you find someone whose weirdness is compatible with you, we call it love. I think that this is beautiful and romantic becuase when you can be yourself with someone else it is most definitley a calling card of love. And when we truly realize that we are all weirdos we realize that that is part of who we are as humans.



 

 

Putting yourself out there and truly LIVING. – To laugh often and love genuinely. To respect others and judge less. To win the affection and sincere smiles of children. To earn the regard of honest peers and endure the betrayal of fake friends. To appreciate the beauty surrounding you wherever you are, whenever you are. To find the good in people and situations. To give what you can and leave the world a little better than you found it. To have explored ideas and passions and sung at the top of your lungs in delight. To know that at least one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is what LIVING is all about.

When I read this I looked at it as a list almost like a bucket list of things that I need to do. I think that when I realize that I am doing one of these things I will know that I am living life. I really want to do all these things and one day reflect on my life and be able to say that I took chances, gave all of myself to someone by opening up to love, that I loved genuinely, that I helped others, that I screamed at the top of my lungs in delight, that I changed the lives of others, that I explored and went on adventures, that I was weird in my own way, that I laughed often, that I left the world a little better than I found it, that I will die with no regrets, that I LIVED.